Why I am pissed off with the blogging community

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Advanced warning that some of you may feel butthurt whilst reading this, but tbh, I don't give a flying fuck anymore.

Okay.

So I have been debating writing a post like this for a while; when I first started blogging I wouldn't have thought twice, I would have just done it and dealt with the consequences if and when they happened; however, over the years, the blogging community has changed and transformed into something I never quite expected when I first set out on this internet journey. To some people, this would be a cause for celebration, but for me, the sheer thought of this causes great anxiety - I used to share a lot of personal posts, my blog was a place where I could just type and share what I wanted, but now I am once again left feeling like the loser kid on the playground, a social outcast, and it's really had an impact on my mental health.

There are so many bloggers out here on the internet now telling you that you're only important if you have X many followers, you have to upload to Instagram X many times and that you have to find your 'niche'. Oh and don't forget about your DA, page views, and analytics etc.. And I'll tell you something for free, it's fucking exhausting. 

I haven't got time for all this bullshit. Fair enough if your blog is your livelihood, then I am presuming that you can make time in your schedules to worry about all of this, but please stop making us small bloggers feel inadequate because our blog is a hobby and not a career. I don't care if you have seventy followers, or seven thousand followers if you seem like a half decent human and write content that I find interesting I will follow you. I am not going to unfollow you if your DA drops below a certain figure, or if you only uploaded to Instagram twice today instead of five. 

I am personally pissed off with feeling inadequate. My blog used to be my place, and now I have to worry about followers, flat lays, and if I am going to be accused of copying someone else's post. I used to love blogging, and now the very thought of posting something has my stomach in knots.

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Fitting in has never been my strong my point, I was never the kid with loads of friends, or that was included in class events, and I thought I had outgrown worrying about that kind of stuff, but now thoughts have returned tenfold.

In primary school, one of the popular girls told me that I wasn't allowed to draw with them at lunch because I didn't have a ring binder. I begged my mum for days to buy me one, and a few days later she surprised me with a Winnie the Pooh one - I was so happy. I went to school the next day with the biggest smile on my face, I was finally going to be allowed to sit with them and draw at lunch! I went over there my ring binder proudly on display, and the girl just laughed at me. Apparently, she forgot to tell me that it had to be a 'Groovy Chick' one. I was mortified. Lucky for me, I had a friend in the group, so I obviously thought that they would try and include me anyway... she emptied her pencil shavings on me and they all ran off giggling. 

Thinking about that story reminds me a lot of the blogging community. Blogs and the bloggers behind them have become very clique'y, and no matter what you try and do, what goals you surpass or what you blog about, the rules are always changing. Don't get me wrong, there are still a lot of decent people in the blogging community, but you always get the select bunch, in Mean Girls terms, The Plastics, that just seem to go out of their way to make other bloggers feel inadequate 

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I didn't write this to slam other bloggers, or the blogging community, in fact, the blogging community as a whole is pretty great, but what I do want is for us to be more inclusive. Invite a wider array of people to your events, include smaller bloggers in your Secret Santa's, don't write someone off because they haven't got a lot of followers, stop forcing people to meet your expectations, don't change said expectations when people have worked so hard to reach them. Actually, speak to people in blog chats instead of setting up auto tweets with links to your blogs throughout the hour.  Fuck the niche, fuck the algorithm, fuck what everyone else is doing, you do you. 

I am pissed off with cliques

I am pissed off with people buying followers

I am pissed off with ace bloggers being overlooked because they don't have many followers

I am pissed off with people trying to be Zoella

I am pissed off with being pissed off.

What I want, is to go back in time, to when I didn't give a fuck, to when I didn't feel pressured to have perfect content, perfect photos, to have what seemed like a perfect life.  I want my little corner of the internet back. 

I don't want to give up blogging, but everything is stressing me out and if I am being honest, I don't know if I can be bothered to keep up anymore. 

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